Tag: God

Fr. Steve’s updates

We had more detailed discussions about the upcoming surgery, meeting with many of the specialists who will be available to help with the spine, blood vessels, urinary system and the sarcoma itself.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

I was in treatment or appointments from 8 – 6 today, which was very tiring.

We had more detailed discussions about the upcoming surgery, meeting with many of the specialists who will be available to help with the spine, blood vessels, urinary system and the sarcoma itself.

What’s scary is that – despite all the scans and tests they have – they really won’t know how extensive the damage is to those areas until they actually go in and remove the tumor. One doctor said, “We’re prepared for many different possibilities. We’re good at thinking on our feet, but basically we have to make it up as we go.”

The difference between best and worst cases is such a wide swing. The fact the tumor is shrinking is encouraging. Most days, I am optimistic and can find a silver lining.

Today was more sobering, facing the details of the serious nature of what is going on inside of me. These are the days I really need to walk with the Lord, trusting God to carry me through.

These are the days I really need to walk with the Lord,
trusting God to carry me through.

Fr. Steve’s updates

It’s inspiring when people leave here after successfully being treated. It’s tougher when occasionally the doctors tell a patient “there’s nothing more we can do for you here.”

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

It’s inspiring when people leave here after successfully being treated. It’s tougher when occasionally the doctors tell a patient “there’s nothing more we can do for you here.”

Tonight, I sat across from one family who got such sad news.

I promised to pray for them, but did not have words that could lift their sorrow and disappointment. I have been praying for them a lot, and the heaviness weighs upon me. We need faith and prayer, especially in the hard times when life isn’t going so well.

Fr. Steve’s updates

Before hitting the road back to the hospital, I stopped at St. Joseph’s health care center to see staff who have been good support through my medical issues.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Before hitting the road back to the hospital, I stopped at St. Joseph’s health care center to see staff who have been good support through my medical issues.

Then, I dropped by the Business Office to say hello to folks there who were beginning their work week. I said hello and goodbye almost in the same breath, yet I wanted to reconnect with the staff who work day in and day out to keep St. Joseph’s going.

Seeing a grin as I walked into an office or work area was great affirmation. Folks are genuinely concerned and shared their prayers and best wishes.

I was tired, and the drive back took a lot more out of me. I was able to get in a quick nap before treatment, which helped. I am finally starting to feel the fatigue from the cumulative effects of the radiation.

This was the first weekend I’ve been away from Hope Lodge, and it was my turn to be welcomed back and have folks at Hope Lodge asking about life and health. For only being together a few short weeks,  we share a lot with each other on this journey.

Fr. Steve’s updates

Fr. Anthony and catechists have been working with this group of students all year to prepare them. They were both ready and excited. Bolstered by the families of the children who received sacraments of initiation, the church was full.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Today, we had a joyful celebration at church – 11 baptisms and 21 first communions!

Fr. Anthony and catechists have been working with this group of students all year to prepare them. They were both ready and excited. Bolstered by the families of the children who received sacraments of initiation, the church was full.

After the round of photos, I heard one youngster remark there were so many flashing bulbs they felt like a Hollywood star. Our dining hall staff prepared a delicious dinner for everyone to share afterwards.

It was my privilege to be at the baptismal font, scooping water over their heads with both hands. Besides making sure they clearly heard the words, I made sure they’d remember getting good and wet!

We hope the spiritual side of our programs helps give these young people an anchor for the future. When times get tough in life, I pray they will have God’s strength to call and draw upon.

Fisher & Stevens Homes had a cookout this evening and invited me to join them.

The constant South Dakota wind announced her presence by blowing our plates around as soon as hot dogs and BBQ were no longer there to weigh them down. Sitting around the picnic tables and talking with students and staff felt relaxing and familiar.

When I’m away, I miss those moments!

Fr. Steve’s updates

When someone finishes the last of their radiation treatments they are invited to give the bell a ring – a sign of celebration, hope, and probably also relief!

Friday, April 9, 2010

On the wall of the radiation waiting room is a bell.

When someone finishes the last of their radiation treatments they are invited to give the bell a ring – a sign of celebration, hope, and probably also relief!

When I first started radiation I was in a waiting room full of strangers, but as the weeks go on, I know more and more of the faces here. Several of the folks reside with me at Hope Lodge, and the time waiting passes quickly as we chat and catch up with each other.

Today, Gene from Oklahoma and Tony from Illinois finished their treatments and a group of us showed up in support as they rang the bell.

Tony had his wife on the cell phone so she could hear the joyful peals. Gene let out a loud YIPPEE! It sounded like a cook calling the cowpokes in for dinner!

We took pictures and had hugs and handshakes all around. I’m impressed by the spirit of camaraderie, and seeing others finish up gives all the rest of us hope.

I’m impressed by the spirit of camaraderie,
and seeing others finish up gives all the rest of us hope.

Fr. Steve’s updates

At our Tuesday night potluck all the people who’ve arrived in the last week stand up and introduce themselves. Anyone who is finishing their treatments and is preparing to go home also gets the chance to impart a few words of wisdom to the group.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

At our Tuesday night potluck all the people who’ve arrived in the last week stand up and introduce themselves. Anyone who is finishing their treatments and is preparing to go home also gets the chance to impart a few words of wisdom to the group.

Bob, from Nevada, was here for over two months. Because of distance, he didn’t get to go home on weekends. But, he made the best of his time and leaves with many new friends.

He advised all of us to get out of our rooms and down to the common areas, where you meet folks from all different backgrounds and professions. One of his favorite new friends was the man who vowed to make at least 5 people smile every day – and usually easily accomplished that by lunch time.

We are our brothers and sisters’ keepers, and caring for one another is what we’re made for.

We are our brothers and sisters’ keepers,
and caring for one another is what we’re made for.

Fr. Steve’s updates

I’ve received piles of get well cards and letters. People share their own struggles to overcome, offer prayers and hope, advice and recipes, cartoons and pictures, prayer books and medals, and even some original art work.

Monday, April 5, 2010

When Brother Clay left this morning, he made sure I had the large box with my mail from the past three weeks.

Again, I’ve received piles of get well cards and letters. People share their own struggles to overcome, offer prayers and hope, advice and recipes, cartoons and pictures, prayer books and medals, and even some original art work.

I was torn between reading through them and watching the White Sox opening day on TV. So, I did both.

Baseball is a leisurely game, and doesn’t require constant attention, so I sat down in the common room with my box and started reading. When the game got exciting, I paid closer attention, and during the lulls, I read a few more notes.

Some were from names I recognized right away, but many shared this common sentiment – “although we’ve never met, through your letters I feel like we’re old friends and I just wanted you to know we’re thinking of you …”

There are so many folks who, over the years, have been such a blessing to St. Joseph’s and now are a real blessing to me.

I had the first seven innings to myself and the letters. The last two innings, I was joined by a couple of other sports fans who came back from their treatments; the talk turned more to baseball and a little to sharing our medical stories.

My team won, and it was a lovely way to spend a good part of the afternoon.

Fr. Steve’s updates

This year’s Holy Week has been so different for me, not having to prepare any homilies or lead services. Instead, I con-celebrated mass this morning at the local parish, where there was uplifting music and a good spirit among the overflowing crowd.

Sunday, April 4, 2010
Easter

This year’s Holy Week has been so different for me, not having to prepare any homilies or lead services. Instead, I con-celebrated mass this morning at the local parish, where there was uplifting music and a good spirit among the overflowing crowd.

The pastor introduced me and told folks that I was here for cancer treatments. Standing in the doorway afterward to shake hands and wish folks a happy Easter, countless folks came up and offered their prayers and support. Some told me briefly of their being survivors. All urged me to have faith and courage. And, the experience of prayer and community increased my faith and courage.

I’ve been told it’s important not to lose much weight before surgery, and having two Easter dinners probably has me looking to gain rather than lose over the weekend!

Right after church, Brother Clay and I went to a downtown hotel for a lovely Easter brunch. In the evening, some of the Franciscan sisters invited me over for dinner. One sister, who was in novitiate during World War II (she has just a few more years of religious life than me!) recalled how disappointing it was that they couldn’t initially receive their profession cross because silver was rationed at that time! But with 65+ years as a sister, I think her vows definitely took.

Fr. Steve’s updates

There’s comfort in walking a journey that others have taken as well. Robin had surgery some time ago and spoke highly of the surgeon that will also be operating on me.

Friday, April 2, 2010

When I went downstairs to the common room to read the morning paper and have a cup of tea, I met a couple – Robin and Gary – who just arrived at Hope Lodge this week. After talking about what we do and where we’re from, we compared cancer stories.

Robin also has sarcoma, and it’s the first time either of us has met a kindred soul sharing this disease. There’s comfort in walking a journey that others have taken as well. Robin had surgery some time ago and spoke highly of the surgeon that will also be operating on me.

Good Friday services took on new meaning for me.

I often have a hard time getting into the suffering and agony part. Like most of us, it’s part of life I don’t much like to think about.

This year is different for me because my illness has opened my eyes wider to the reality of suffering that so many people face on a daily basis. The cross is more real as well. The whole point is to take our burdens to the cross in prayer and find the strength to daily pick up our cross and courageously walk with it, through it, and even in spite of it, in faith.

Brother Clay arrived this afternoon for a visit. He caught me up on the people and events at school, and we shared a movie and evening meal. I appreciated his company.

Fr. Steve’s updates

While I’m lying on the table receiving radiation, I’ve found myself using those 15 minutes for prayer. Some are petitions as I think about family and friends who need strength to face their own struggles. Some are just moments of thanks for the blessings that come my way each day.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

While I’m lying on the table receiving radiation, I’ve found myself using those 15 minutes for prayer. Some are memorized prayers I’ve said since I was a child. Some are petitions as I think about family and friends who need strength to face their own struggles. Some are just moments of thanks for the blessings that come my way each day.

And, I pray for healing. Instead of the treatments increasing my anxiety level, I come away refreshed and blessed.

Tonight for Holy Thursday, I con-celebrated mass at the local parish. Sometimes it’s difficult to find people willing to get their feet washed, but here many folks eagerly participated. That ritual does inspire in me compassion and renews God’s call to service.

This community attracts people from all over the world, and the prayer intentions reflected that. Parish members offered their petitions in English, Arabic, Portuguese, Ukrainian, Lingala, Gaelic and Spanish. Despite our differences, we’re all united as members of God’s family.