Claire – Page 3 – St. Joseph's Indian School

Super Bowl Party!

St. Joseph’s Sheehy Home was separated by Raven’s fans and 49ers fans. — San Francisco fans on the right, Baltimore fans on the left.

Ah yes. Time for post-Super Bowl Monday Morning Quarterbacking. What was done, what wasn’t done, what should have been done instead. I’m not talking about the game of course. I’m talking about the 5^th Annual High School Super Bowl party! In the past, Anita from Sheehy home has done much of the organizing for the party. When she suggested this as an activity for St. Joseph’s High School Student Leadership Group, they jumped at the chance. We have planned several events this year and have learned some important lessons through trial and error.

This was going to be our Comeback Kid moment.

We were going to show the world how great we could be.

We’ve been working together long enough that we can play to each other’s strengths. We coordinated a menu with contributions from each high school home. Dawson loves to be helpful and is eager to jump in, but he often takes on too many tasks and can’t do it all. He was allowed to take on two tasks. He picked up the pop for Giles home and hand delivered invitations to the eighth grade homes, high school staff and homes. Andrew knows that he gets busy, so he picked a task that he could do immediately and be done. He called up and secured a large-screen TV for the Raven’s room. Erica is good at contacting people through e-mails, so she did some coordinating of donations. Leahanna likes hands-on tasks, so she counted out the M&Ms for our guessing game. Chris loves to orchestrate and organize. He took care of designing and printing the invitations. The kids helped me make a list of snacks and prizes that would not be “lame.” Everyone agreed to stay and help clean up afterwards.

Come Sunday evening, we were ready.

Sort of.

All the assigned tasks were covered, except for decorating. (Note to self: next year assign a set-up crew as well as a clean-up crew.) We had plenty of food. We had plenty of pop, water and Gatorade. We had games for the non-football fans. We had cool prizes. (Note to self: the punch balls were noisy and obnoxious, especially when the kids started bouncing them off of each other. Get more next year.)

Patrick acted as referee, blowing his whistle whenever there was a touchdown, interception, field goal, etc., and drawing names for prizes. (Note to self: get him a smaller whistle, or don’t let the teams make so many touchdowns. Ouch!) We had 40 students and 20 adults over the course of the evening. This includes a dozen eighth graders who were getting a taste of life in the high school homes. Everyone seemed to have a good time – 49ers fans being the exception, but that wasn’t the group’s fault.

St. Joseph’s Super Bowl party quieted down during halftime. — The Raven’s fans at St. Joseph’s relax during halftime.

House parents did a lot of behind-the-scenes management, from cooking the taco meat and hot wings, to making the veggie trays, to securing coolers, and surreptitiously throwing cans into the recycling bin. But at the end of the night, the kids made short work of taking trash out, sweeping floors and rearranging furniture.

One challenge our team faces this year as a group is commitment. Sometimes members don’t attend meetings or don’t contribute. Sometimes members agree to contribute with great enthusiasm, but time flies and agreements are forgotten. Sometimes, opportunities to grow and serve just don’t take root at all – maybe because of apathy or maybe because some ideas just aren’t as brilliant in the cold light of day as they are on paper.

Some plans get supplanted by more attractive, immediate pleasures like Facebook, basketball games, and afternoon naps. Some commitments get choked out by worries, fears, and problems. Who can think ahead when a loved one back home is ill or the news is full of stories about the end of the world?

Positive opportunities even compete with each other—school, jobs, sports, theater, college visits. A person can get pretty overwhelmed! But every so often, an idea takes root and grows. A small, dedicated core group maintains their determination and focus. They coax their peers into coming along. Sometimes we end up with something unexpectedly special.

The Lakota students cheer for their favorite team during the Super Bowl. — Go Ravens!

So this Monday, I can say that I am proud of my team and their performance. They showed dedication and commitment. They overcame a tough start, and finished the season on a high note. Sometimes they made me kind of nervous, and I wondered if they were going to pull it off. They hung in there! And of course, they have an awesome fan base. This team has dedicated supporters from all over the country. We couldn’t have done this without them cheering us on and having faith in us. Thank you, and thank God!

By the way, who won? I didn’t really have a chance to watch the game….

Claire

Guest Blogger: Claire

Three Native American girls showing off their beautiful regalia. — Looking great girls! Juliana, Paite and Grace in their beautiful powwow regalia.

In honor of my Dad’s 70^th birthday (Sunday), I am dedicating three sets of regalia I have sewn for St. Joseph’s powwow. I think this is a fitting tribute. My Dad’s grandfather was born on the Yankton Indian reservation here in South Dakota, before moving to Michigan in the early 1900’s.

Grandpa kept his heritage a secret, probably because of the prejudices of that period. So many of the great things about my dad are things he learned from his grandpa, and these are things he passed on to my brothers—skills in carpentry, camping, fixing things and telling stories. Sadly, Dad didn’t learn about his Nakota traditions growing up, so this wasn’t something he was able to share with us kids. This makes me sad when I think about it.

Later in life, Dad started getting curious about his grandfather’s history, and started learning about Native American traditions and culture. I think this influenced my decision to work at St. Joseph’s Indian School and to participate in the seventh grade Cultural Trip for the past two years. I want today’s kids to know and be proud of their culture.

My family history is important to me. My mother’s family has a proud tradition of sewing. Busha (my great grandma) used to sew vestments for the parish priest, and I learned to sew on her treadle machine. I feel closest to my mom and Grammy when I am sewing. When I make regalia, I feel like I am honoring both of my great-grandmas — my Polish one and my Nakota one.

I am grateful to the donors and supporters of St. Joseph’s Indian School, who make things like powwow, our cultural trip and ceremony possible. In this season of giving, sometimes the gift of memories and pride are the most lasting of all. Thanks again, Claire!

Guest Blogger: Claire

Ahhhh, Halloween. It is a great day to flirt with the things that scare us the most, and poke a little fun at the dark side of life. In other words, it’s just another typical day in St. Joseph’s High School Program.

I kicked off my Halloween season with parent teacher conferences at Chamberlain High School last Thursday. I really did not need to be afraid. I sat at a table marked “Giles Home” with a printout of my 10 students. One by one, the CHS teachers came by to talk about students’ progress in their classes. We keep close track of missing assignments and grades, so there weren’t any surprises. I heard the usual feedback that students do well on daily work but struggle on tests. The individual remarks were very heartening though.

“He’s a great kid.”

“He seems very interested in the subject.”

“He contributes a lot to discussions.”

“He has terrific penmanship.”

The following day, the Giles Home departed on a long weekend home trip to Rapid City. We started out by climbing Harney Peak, the highest point in the Black Hills. In the snow. Who’s afraid of a 6 hour hike in the snow, right? Who’s afraid of not keeping up with 10 guys with boundless energy and the skill of mountain goats? Who’s afraid of not making it back down before dark and having to use an iPhone for a flashlight?

Nay!

What we had to be afraid of was getting in their way at the chow line at Golden Corral afterwards.

The next day, we took them to Flags and Wheels, where they got to play go-karts, laser tag and bumper cars. This would not be scary, except that houseparents Melissa, Aaron and I are veterans of the high school summer program. We know that these guys are going to be in driver’s ed next year. They demonstrated some serious demolition skills with those bumper cars. Ruthless, I tell you!

Who thinks these boys are ready for drivers ed?!

And of course we had to go to a haunted house at the Rapid City fairgrounds. Caden (Aaron and Melissa’s 8 year old son) set the tone by hugging the big scary monster that greeted us in the parking lot.

Aww, shucks, how scary could the Terror in the Dark house be? Despite this rather benign first impression, two guys didn’t even make it past the second room before surrendering, “I’m out!!” The rest of the rooms were a blur of blood-curdling shrieks, menacing monsters and guys clinging to each other for dear life. I was NOT the only one screaming like a girl. Yes, some days it is good to be terrorized by things that can’t actually hurt you. Especially if you have good friends nearby to grab onto, and four reliable houseparents to make sure you get home safely.

Honestly, there are things that scare me a lot more than icy mountains, funhouse cars and latex monster masks. Failing at things, for example. I hate failing at things. I go to insane lengths to make sure that projects and plans go off without a hitch. So why am I so twitchy about Halloween this year? Because I have handed the reins over to the high schoolers.

This is the first year of doing a high school Student Leaders Group. As part of our mission to prepare the students for life after high school, we are turning over some tasks and responsibilities to the students themselves. We have formed a leadership group with delegates from each of the homes. I act as an advisor, but I’m not actually “in charge” of anything. Right now, they are trying to pull off a Halloween party.

Leadership Group has had a rocky start. The first activity they planned was a dodgeball game. It did not happen.

The second task they chose was to write a persuasive letter to the HS director in order to change a rule that they didn’t like. That took some coaching on my part.

“No, saying ‘the rule is stupid’ is not sufficient.”

One of the delegates turned in a thoughtful, clear and rational reason that the rule could be changed. Oh yeah!

No one else finished theirs though. Augh!

The last activity they planned, the Red Ribbon Relay Race (say that 10x fast!) was beset with commitment issues. The leaders who came through worked very hard but ran into unforeseeable difficulties. Can anyone really divide a bunch of half-frozen kids into small groups and convince them to run around in a circle? Note to self: get a bigger megaphone.

It is the day of Halloween and we are still working on a plan for the party. This is where that fear of failure raises its ugly head. I have to resist the urge to take over and tell people what to do, or worse, do it myself. Because the point of all of this is not to have an event go perfectly. The purpose is for the students to make a plan, make adjustments, make concessions, make mistakes, make corrections and make the best of it. My purpose is not to decide for them what is possible. The purpose is for them to figure out what they are capable of doing.

We ended our planning session on a positive note. Each delegate has a list of things s/he is responsible for. They have a best-case plan and a back up plan in case that doesn’t work out. A lot of this means them asking for what they want, and deciding what to do if they can’t have it. They have done an impressive job foreseeing obstacles and brainstorming solutions.

This means that they are moving away from accepting “No, that can’t be done,” and moving towards finding ways that it can be done. Anyone who works with teens knows that this can be scary and exhilarating.

What if the kids start thinking for themselves and *gasp* start asking questions? What kind of a monster have we awakened?! Hopefully, some sort of quasi-adult, thoughtful monster. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

Claire, High School Houseparent

Guest Blogger: Claire

Native American boys having fun in the sun! — Having fun in the sun!

The high school kids had a long Labor Day weekend, and all of the homes planned special trips for the occasion. The Giles Home (freshmen boys) decided that they wanted to camp out at the Lifelight concert in Sioux Falls. Lifelight is a free Christian music festival that attracts over 300,000 people every year. There are five stages, merchandise booths, concessions and all sorts of activities going on throughout the weekend. Plus there is a large area set aside for people who want to tent camp.

Trips like these are one of the ways we can build Circle of Courage values (Independence, Mastery, Belonging and Generosity) while disguising it as “just having fun.” It’s kind of like drowning broccoli in cheese sauce so that they don’t realize it’s good for them. 🙂

The Giles boys are good at Belonging. They get along well together and look out for each other. Unless of course, someone farts in the tent. Then it is every man for himself. They also warned each other not to trip over the … cord for the rain fly. Usually after someone face planted on the ground, but still.

They are surprisingly Generous. We saw a man holding a, “Will work for food” sign by the side of the road. They gathered together some of their favorite snacks, and Isaiah hopped off the mini-bus to deliver them. The boys’ favorite part was when I accidentally started the bus back up while Isaiah was changing seats, and he went bouncing down the aisle. Oops.

Independence skills like checking in on time are very important, especially in a crowded, several-acre venue. Most of the boys did a great job coming back to the campsite every hour and checking in with a houseparent before going back out to catch a show, play some hoops, listen to a band or check out the cute girls. What, huh? Flirting at a Christian festival? Ohhhh yeah. All those “Free Hug” signs are just irresistible. Sadly, one boy did get “lost.” Finding a missing kid among 100,000 visitors is quite a challenge. After calling out a search party for him, we found him happily hanging out with another SJIS home. Phew! Apparently, he had taken on more responsibility than he could manage, so his freedoms were curtailed for the evening.

They guys had lots of opportunities to demonstrate Mastery, from putting up/striking tents, to working the camping lanterns, to making s’mores on the camp stove. We forgot sticks, but they came up with the brilliant idea of using a (clean) metal tent-peg. Perfect! Another challenge for them was visiting the cathedral in Sioux Falls for Mass. The impressive Romanesque architecture, incense, Latin inscriptions and chanted prayers are very different from the Mass for Children that they celebrate at Our Lady of the Sioux Chapel on St. Joseph’s campus. They followed along pretty well, just like they would at home, only with a bit more looking around.

“This is cool.”

All around, it was a good Labor Day weekend. It felt good to get back to the Giles Home and into the air conditioning. And showers. And real beds. The boys are already talking about plans for our next home trip, which we will take next semester. They are thinking skiing. (I might as well start practicing to use crutches now.)

Thank you again for your generosity, which makes trips like these possible. I hope to see some of you at our powwow, which is coming up in a few weeks!

Claire

High School Houseparent

Guest Blogger: Claire

Hi again! My name is Claire, and I am a houseparent in the high school program. I’m excited to be back, starting my fifth year here at St. Joseph’s Indian School. This week is all-staff orientation. Those of us that have been gone part of the summer rejoin our hard-working year-round colleagues for a week of training, refreshers and refocusing. This can be pretty exciting, especially when we all arrive in chapel on Monday morning and someone holds up a “free hugs” sign. Woo hoo!

We usually start off with smudging—the Lakota tradition of burning sage—which is a symbolic cleansing of our minds, hearts and bodies with the smoke. This sets a prayerful space and atmosphere for our work together in the upcoming year.

Our orientation theme this year was “Nourishing Mind, Body, Heart and Spirit.”

How cool is that?

After all, we are not just about teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Our goal is to prepare kids for life outside of St. Joseph’s, so they can be strengthened by relationships, faith, a sense of culture and history, and skills for living. In order to do that, we have to bring our whole selves into the equation—which is why we start the year with prayer, sage, free hugs and even some darn good bread which the Pastoral Care staff handed out.

A lot of this week is about remembering our mission, and focusing on what we hope to accomplish in the upcoming year. For us houseparents, one challenge is to bring the oyate values outlined in our Circle of Courage into our daily routines. Those values are: Belonging, Independence, Mastery and Generosity.

We all agree that we do a great job at building a sense of belonging. We are very good at building relationships with our kids, their families and with each other. We are turning our attention to other areas where we are not so strong. Sometimes, in our efforts to build relationships, we end up doing too much for our kids, to the detriment of their sense of mastery, independence and generosity. We had some serious and thoughtful discussions on how and where we can work on these areas.

Not all of orientation is fun, I will admit. Our newly hired staff have already completed a full week of training, and their heads are about to explode with facts, figures, rules and guidelines.

Veteran staff members groan a bit when we get to the part that we have heard every year. Over and over and over. For those of you who are uninitiated in the joys of orientation, let me sum up Day Two as briefly as possible:

Rule #1: Treat your co-workers with respect. Play Nice.

Rule #2: If you make a mess, please clean it up.

Rule #3: If the mess involves blood or other body fluids, use gloves.

Rule #4: If the mess is on fire, call 911.

Rule #5: If you can’t seem to follow Rule #1, make SURE you follow Rules #2-5.

I think I can manage that!

Thank you for continuing to hold the kids and staff at St. Joseph’s in your prayers as we kick off the 2012-2013 school year. So far, we’re off to a good start.

Guest Blogger: Claire

Lakota girls posing for a picture. — The girls had a great time on their trip!

Hello again! Only a few short weeks ago, I was writing about the upcoming Cultural Trip with the incoming eighth-grade girls. I was very excited, because we had been planning for months, and I was eager to get on the road!

As the saying goes, if you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans. The morning we left, we experienced a change in staff, kids, itinerary and vehicles. Yikes! We repacked our gear, reprinted our route, piled onto the mini-bus and headed out for a week of winging it. This turned out to be a blessing.

Uncertainty is a great prioritizer. Instead of focusing on where we were going to be and when, we shifted more towards how we were going to be and why. Our first evening together, we did not do anything on our itinerary. The world did not come to an end.

Instead of hurrying to get somewhere, we stopped to celebrate Cassidy’s birthday at the Golden Corral. As luck would have it, Fr. Steve was able to join us. Of course, we waited until he left the table to practice a Pinger Home birthday tradition: whipped cream in the face. What, who, us?

We got to our campsite early, and spent the evening making prayer ties/prayer flags. April guided the girls through the process, explaining the use of sage and tobacco and the connections between colors and directions. Since Fr. Steve wasn’t able to join is for this, the girls decided they would each make him a prayer flag, that way he would have prayers for climbing Bear Butte too. Praying together in this way built a sense of belonging, both to each other and to something bigger. This was a very positive way to start of our journey together, talking about hopes and dreams, prayers and intentions.

Two girls and Fr. Steve at the top of Bear Butte. — “We made it to the top!”

Letting go of expectations and just being in the moment was an ongoing theme for the week. The morning we met Fr. Steve at Bear Butte, it was so foggy that we actually drove past the mountain without seeing it. The trails were wet and visibility was low, and we weren’t sure if we should attempt the climb in these conditions.

We just decided to carry our prayer ties and hike for however long we needed to. Some of the girls got as far as the third switchback and had enough. A few more kept on for quite a ways longer and then headed back as well. Some girls just kept going. A little further. And then a little further. Finally, we just committed to making it to the top. There wasn’t much to see in the fog—no scenic overlooks, no way to trace the path ahead or behind. What seemed disappointing at first turned out to be a gift. The fog actually made it easier to stay in the moment. Having to focus on each step along the way meant not being distracted by what was “way over there.” Not “having to” make it to the summit made it easier to enjoy the process of getting there.

We had similar experiences the following day at Mato Tipila, more commonly known as Devil’s Tower. The girls said “Let’s walk the long trail!” (Is this ever a good idea?) But it was sunny and bright, and it seemed like a lovely day to take the long road. So off we went, pausing every so often to pose for pictures, pick sage or sniff the trees. (The pine trees smell like cinnamon rolls. I kid you not.)

Hiking group at Devil's Tower. — We had a beautiful day at Devil’s Tower.

After about two hours, I admit I started to get a bit nervous. It was hot, we hadn’t seen any other hikers for quite some time, and it seemed like we were not anywhere close to being done. Ellie and I had just crested ANOTHER long hill, when a soft breeze picked up. Ellie looked at me and said, “I think Grandfather is looking out for us.” A minute later, two hikers passed us going in the opposite direction and assured us cheerfully that we were “almost there.” Bless you, Ellie.

Sometimes setbacks opened up into opportunities: our dinner plans with friends of April’s fell through. Instead, we were invited to an inipi – sweat lodge. Three girls who were nervous about trying something new decided to take a leap of faith and take part in the ceremony.

Other times, opportunities for learning and sharing arose spontaneously. While out walking, several of the girls started to ask about Lakota/Dakota names for the animals. They shared phrases that they had learned from their grandmothers, or asked April, “How do you say….”

While touring United Tribes Technical College, one girl said,

“I hadn’t even thought about college before, but I can really see myself going here.”

Although we had times of being prayerful and serious, we rarely missed an opportunity to get silly—lip-syncing at passing traffic on the bus, setting marshmallows on fire, falling down on the trails, incessantly shouting “Inkpaduta!!” Inkpaduta is the name of one of the quarries at Pipestone National Monument. It really caught on.

I asked the girls what their favorite moments on the trip were. Several responses involved someone falling on their behinds while hiking – they are eighth graders, after all. Other girls mentioned that they liked having a chance to participate in ceremony (inipi, prayer ties, sacred pipe). Others liked seeing new places, especially Devil’s Tower.

For me, I needed the reminder that it was ok to let go and trust. I could have faith that God would guide April and I, and that everything would work out the way it needed to. I also needed to be reminded that we weren’t going this alone, that we had support from staff, family, friends and donors. I’m already planning on going again next year … knock on wood!

Guest blogger: Claire

Today is the day! After months of preparation, it is finally time to leave for the cultural trip with the 7^th graders. The boys and girls travel in separate groups, visiting significant cultural, spiritual and historical sites of the Lakota people. I will be traveling with the girls, and we will be making a large loop through South Dakota, Wyoming, Montana, North Dakota and Minnesota.

The purpose of this trip is to introduce the students to places that are important to their Native American culture. More than just reading about things in a book, they can experience the power of these places up close. An important component of this trip is daily journaling, so they can record their feelings and impressions for later. If there comes a time in their lives when they need spiritual strength, they will know some of the places and traditions that can sustain them. And it’s not all just “serious stuff.” We get to do goofy camping stuff too, like cook out, tell ghost stories and chuck rocks into the crick. This is an amazing group of kids, and it is great to spend time with them.

Dan looks like george Custer! — We think Dan might resemble George Custer a bit!

My companions on this journey will be April, a counselor here and a Dakota elder, and Dan, a houseparent and forensic anthropologist. We will be accompanying 6 teenage girls on a 7 day, thousand mile quasi-camping trip. In a mini-bus. For those of you already moaning in sympathy, it is ok. We are professionals. We can handle this. We will be mostly cabin camping, which removes the logistical nightmare of pitching tents in the dark, or in a flood plain, or other such creepy things, while still being close to the great outdoors. (Let the boys sleep under the stars or pitch tents on the prairie, or whatever.) We will be doing a lot of hiking. Did I mention I used to be a Girl Scout? That means I can use a compass. Of course Dan has GPS on his phone, so that’s a moot point.

The trip covers a lot of territory, but I will share some of the highlights. On Saturday we will be climbing Bear Butte in the Black Hills. This is very sacred site for many Native American tribes, and is a place where people may go for a hanbleceya – vision quest. April will teach the girls how to make prayer ties for the climb, and will carry a canupe – sacred pipe for a ceremony at the summit. Fr. Steve will be joining us for this part of the trip, and will celebrate Mass with us when we get back to town.

We will visit another sacred site, Devil’s Tower, on our way to see the Little Bighorn Battlefield. Dan has done some analysis of artifacts from this site, and has lots of “really cool stuff” to share. (Normally, if Dan has “cool stuff” to share, you better not be eating, but this will probably be an exception.) Other sites along the way are: Painted Canyons of North Dakota, On-a-Slant Village, Fort Abraham Lincoln, Crazy Horse Memorial, and Pipestone National Monument.

This is a big undertaking, and an incredible opportunity for these kids. All you campers out there know what I mean. I am so grateful to have the support of donors and benefactors so that we can make this happen. I am also thankful for all the prayers from friends and supporters for our safe travels. Pilamaya! Doksa!

Claire

A group of Native American girls on the top of Bear Butte! — Here’s a picture of last year’s group on the top of Bear Butte!

Who is easier, boys or girls?

Due to some staffing changes, last month I found myself moving from my comfortable world of teenage girldom, to that uncharted territory of testosterone known as the high school boys’ homes. I was a bit nervous at first. I haven’t lived in a house full of teenage boys since I graduated from high school umpty-scrunch years ago. My hazy memories of life with 4 brothers included garage bands, broken bones, girls calling all hours of the day and night, and mechanical objects being taken apart and reassembled with varying degrees of success. So when I stepped into Sheehy Home and saw the drum set, the crutches and partially disassembled remote control, at least it felt familiar if not entirely comfortable.

We were debating this in a staff meeting earlier this year. Which group is easier: high school girls or boys? Hands down, people seem to think that girls are harder. Sure, “boys will be boys,” meaning that they end up in the ER with freak accident injuries from jumping over couches or doing handstands. Sure, boys leave towels all over the floor. How do they use so many towels and why? I don’t know. But girls? Girls are “emotional”. No, girls have subtly nuanced levels of emotional upheaval that would be hard to plumb with a PhD, a compass and a troop of Avon representatives. Or so I’m told. But I sure do miss them.

So I’m off to a new adventure, one that, according to popular wisdom will be infinitely “easier” than the journey I have been on. Right now, I can rely on the wise counsel of people who have already established relationships with the boys. Or I can even ask what would Jesus do in this situation. Not that he ever had 18 teenage boys to take care of. But he must have had some dealings with adolescents because he made a whole sermon about them: blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall take the middle seat and save all of the rest of mankind from the wrath of the driver; blessed are those who hunger for justice, for they will make sure that you enforce the rules fairly or at least see to it that you know when you’re being unjust; blessed are those who mourn, especially those who have to mourn too soon and too often and too much, because they will change your life and make you rethink your priorities.

In writing this out, I concluded that I have been looking at this move from the wrong angle. The question really isn’t “Who is easier?” but “What do I have to offer, and what gets in the way?” One stumbling block is having dumb ideas about what boys are like or girls are like,

“I can’t work with boys! I’m too girly! I am not good with power tools! I can’t talk about sports or hunting! It’s a disaster!”

Another obstacle is knowing that these boys need more than just what I have to offer, and thinking somehow I need to solve that. That’s a mistake I think a lot of us make: thinking our small part isn’t enough and the little that we can do doesn’t matter. Really, what is needed for a whole lot of little somethings to come together.

So, what does a middle-aged white woman have to offer a bunch of teenage Lakota guys? What does anyone have to offer another? When in doubt, go back to the basics: Show up. Pay attention. Give a hoot. Keep showing up. Make sure the same person keeps showing up each time, and not some façade constructed to make sure we all get along. Occasionally bake brownies.

I genuinely like these kids, so showing up and caring isn’t all that hard. (The boys think I’m a little weird, but they’re also pretty forgiving. ) As for all their other supporters near and far, families, role models, teachers, elders, mentors, and caring friends like you—just keep doing your part. Tune in, show up, take interest, give a hoot and keep us in your prayers. Now wasn’t that easy?

Region Champions

Ahhh! Basketball playoffs! They are the best! Tuesday we got to watch the Chamberlain Cubs pull off an exciting upset win over the Eagle Butte Braves to take home the Regional Championship. St. Joseph’s took a fan bus to Pierre, South Dakota to support the Cubs, and several staff and homes caravanned along as well.

Everyone seems to like something different about going to a basketball game. Some of our kids just like to hang out and socialize with friends. They don’t even seem to know that a game is going on. As long as they get their giant dill pickle and blue Powerade from the concession stand, they are set.

Some of our kids (and staff/parents) watch the game but still don’t know what is going on. They like to make helpful suggestions like, “Put in [insert kid’s name]!!” Or, if the kid is already in the game, “Go! Score! Win!”

It doesn’t really matter that he is playing defense, after all.

In every crowd there are people who actually know what is going on. They know the difference between a block and a charge. They know a steal from a foul and whether that pivot foot travelled. They keep stats and holler out useful suggestions,

“Watch your follow through! Keep your head up!”

Of course, sometimes there is a debate as to whether the people “in the know” are the ones in the stands, or the men in the stripes out on the floor. This is a good time to go to the concession stand.

I personally like to join the cheerleaders. I have three in my home. Most days I see them wandering the halls, swinging their arms and muttering cryptic phrases like “Eat ‘em up Cubs.” Or beat ‘em up? Team ‘em up?

You would think I would have figured out the cheers by now … but no. The Cub Mascot is also a St. Joseph’s student, and his houseparent shares my confusion. For now, we have decided that the words to the fight song are simply “Na na na na nanana,” at high volume.

Chamberlain Cubs team pictures. — Who doesn't love basketball? Congratulations!

The best part of this game? Several of our St. Joseph’s students are from Eagle Butte, so visiting with friends and family was wonderful. Somebody got to play with an adorable baby niece with big pink cheeks. Sigh.

Oh, and watching our 6 foot senior go up and get his Regional medal.

And our junior forward, injured in a game last week, getting carried out on his teammate’s shoulders so he could cut down the game net. Priceless.

Did I mention that we won? And that we’re going to state?

What’s your favorite part about high school basketball?

Inspired at their courage

A Native American girl knitting. — Abbi loves her new hobby: knitting.

I sometimes hold the mistaken belief that I am teaching something. A few weeks ago, I sat down on the couch with a ball of yarn and my knitting needles, trying to make a cable knit scarf. Within minutes, several girls were sitting with me watching.

“Oooooh! Can you teach me to knit?”

We spent that evening, and many evenings after, sitting in the living room with donated yarn and needles, working on the basics. Knitting usually involves two kinds of stitches—either wrapping the yarn towards or away. Moving back and forth – between towards and away – creates patterns that are both beautiful and elastic. We spent our time focusing on just one direction, repeating it over and over again. The girls were surprised at how fast I could stitch, and I had to remind them that I had many years of practice. They settled in happily with their projects, slowly working their needles.

It turns out that I had a lot to learn from these girls. They had no trouble at all asking for help. Our knitting times were punctuated with,

“Help! I think I messed up! Did I do this right? Can you help me fix this?”

They weren’t always sure what “right” looked like. Often enough, they hadn’t actually made a mistake. We’d look together, count the stitches, examine the loops, and make a few tugs. Then they were right back to work. In order to master a skill, sometimes you have to rely on someone more skillful than yourself to show you the way.

They were also much better at handling unraveling. If they made a big mistake or got tangled up or things fell apart, they happily came back to me with empty needles and a skein and said,

“Can you start me over again?” And again? And again?

Lakota (Sioux) child knitting in a rocking chair. — Dakota, and the girls did a great job!

Because sometimes the process is much more important than the product. Sometimes we really don’t need to get something “done,” we just need to do it. No need to get attached to an outcome. No need to freak out when that cable pattern gets turned inside out and it can’t be fixed and you have to give up and undo 6 hours of work (ahem). Unraveling is not the end of the world.

And sometimes we don’t need to “do” something as much as we need to be with someone while we’re doing it. If we’re sitting in the living room together – stitching and unraveling, moving towards and away, mastering and forgetting and re-mastering – then the real skill is one of belonging.

In these past few weeks I have learned so much from these girls. They set an example of how to recover from a mistake with grace. Whether on the basketball court, on the playground or in the knitting circle, they demonstrate the power of admitting a mistake and setting it right. They trust their houseparents to hold them accountable, help them course-correct, and then celebrate their success when they get it right. I’ve been inspired at their courage in the face of so much unraveling.

Perhaps the girls will come away from this experience with a scarf or a new hobby. I’m hoping that their time knitting will provide them with a sense of Mastery and Belonging. Learning, after all, will show up in rather unexpected places.

Claire, courtesy of Pinger Home